The Vampire Diaries REVIEW Season 7 Episode 1 ‘Day One of Twenty-Two Thousand, Give or Take’

The Vampire Diaries REVIEW Season 7 Episode 1 ‘Day One of Twenty-Two Thousand, Give or Take’

Here is your recap of The Vampire Diaries REVIEW Season 6 Finale ‘I’m Thinking of You All the While’. For more Vampire Diaries recaps and reviews, click HERE…

Stefan shows up at. Ashes on the pier out of breath and injured. He goes in and there are two coffins inside. He opens the one with a very asleep and white faced Damon in it. He takes a blood bag and puts it to his mouth and says wake up I need you. Damon’s all better.

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Caroline is sitting on. Bench writing in her Elena diary. She talks about how Elena asked her to do it so that when she woke up it would t feel like she missed anything. Caroline tells her that Damon kidnapped Alaric for a guy getaway in Germany. It show the two of them chugging beers. Bonnie appears with a big bottle of water she is there as the chaperon. Caroline writes about how Matt will be deputy Donovan in a week. Caroline tells her about the bench the put up in honor of her mother and says she visits in hopes she will start missing her less.

Stefan appears and Caroline ask him what he is doing. He tells her Matt told him about some blood bags missing from the hospital. Caroline ask if it’s mom. Stefan says if it isn’t then she dropped off the face of the earth. She ask about Damon. Stefan sits down next to her. Stefan ask if he made this a thing. Caroline denies it and he says you just asked about my brother who you hate to fill awkward silence. Caroline says she does t hate him that ah eras just scrambling to fill the awkward silence.

Caroline says ok it’s a thing. Stefan says new rule you love your life and heal and in the meantime we are friends. Caroline says she lies that rule. Stefan tells her happy writing and leaves. Caroline says thank you and gets back to writing for Elena. Stefan walks past a other girl who is writing in a diary. She talks about what hell her life is. The girl is distracted by her phone as she walks and ends up getting hit by a car. They guy convinces the girl they need to drive off and leave her there. As they take off she sits up and says complete and utter hell. She is one Lily’s heretic’s we find out shortly. Lily is serving some of them tea.

Meanwhile in Amsterdam Alaric can’t feel his cheeks. He ask Damon what they are drinking. Damon says he has no idea he can’t read German. Alaric says its actually Dutch. Damon says, “Oh, here are we.” Bonnie says Amsterdam and then starts writing her own entry for Elena. Alaric ask her if it’s necessary. Bonnie says yes because when Alaric dies from alcohol poisoning Elena is going to want to know everything.

Damon says well unless she tragically dies from choking on the cocktail peanuts he can always tell her. Bonnie says she is going to rent a bike and be a normal tourist. Damon suggest she forget to rent a helmet or not look both ways when crossing the tram tracks. Bonnie says she’s got it. Alaric laughs. Alaric ask Damon if is sure he doesn’t want to go with Bonnie. Damon says nice try but he isn’t leaving him. Alaric says he doesn’t need a babysitter. Damon says it isn’t about what he needs its about what Damon needs because keeping him from jumping off a cliff keeps his mind off the fact his girlfriend is in a magical coma. Alaric says so my misery is just a distraction for Damon. Damon says yup. Alaric smiles at Damon. Damon says what. Alaric tells him he is glad he is there.

Lily tells her groupies that she is headed to New York to meet up with Enzo. They give her crap because they are stuck in a house while she gets to go out into the world. The girl who got hit comes flying in the door and tells Lily what happened. Lily is proud of her for not fighting back. The others look angry. She heads upstairs.

The boy and the girl are cleaning the car when the three girls from Lily’s shows up and makes short order of them. One of them snaps a selfie with the dead body. One of them calls her vain. She says if they were this pretty they would be as well.

Later at the crime scene. Stefan and Matt see the boy and the girl hanging upside down with their blood everywhere. Matt ask what happened.

Stefan has Damon on the phone and tells him the heretic’s are back. Damon says he sounds a little fuzzy and says it sounds like you said mom hit her family of crazies back. Damon wants some details. Matt is only to kind to give them. Stefan tells him about a house that has been in foreclosure for over two years but mysteriously had its power turned back on two days after Alaric’s wedding. Stefan tells them Caroline is staking it out (no pun intended).
Stefan says he needs Alaric to tell him how to make a bomb. Damon says for you and Alaric takes the phone. Alaric says he will have to call Stefan back. He gets up and walks away. Bonnie and Damon argue a bit. Damon takes admit from a glass. He comments on it being crappy bourbon. Bonnie takes a drink she says it isn’t bourbon its tea.

Cut to a completely sober Alaric asking some guy about a mystical little stone he has in his hand. The guy says he has never seen it before. He wants the guy to help him communicate with Jo. The guy says he can if he gives him something that belonged to her. Alaric takes out her wedding ring. The guy takes the ring and starts telling Alaric that she loves and misses him. Alaric gets mad and starts yelling at the guy. Alaric than proceeds to beat the shit out of the guy.

Lily wants Enzo to find a missing stone. One that looks a lot like the one Alaric has. Enzo ask what she wants with it. She avoids answering by telling him to be careful. Lily says the reason she wants has to do with a family matter. Enzo refuses to do it. Stefan is making a bomb. Caroline comes in and says there are five of them …three boys and two girls. Stefan ask if Enzo is there and Caroline says no. Caroline is the one who has to set the bomb. Stefan gives her plenty of room to back out.

Caroline and Matt are the ones to take it in. Caroline uses the front door and Matt sneaks in. Caroline goes to leave but the two girls stop her. The selfie one wants the jacket she is wearing. She glamours Caroline who plays along and gives her the jacket. The other one tells her she has to tell her how good she looks. Caroline says she looks amazing, right before the bomb goes off she zooms out the front door with Matt.

Bonnie and Damon are arguing and looking for Alaric. Bonnie tells him what a idiot he is for prancing around Europe for weeks with a guy that wasn’t even really drunk. A truck is coming at Bonnie. Damon sees it but hesitates for a out three seconds before pushing her out of the way. Bonnie thanks him but then lays into him for letting,g her almost get it. Damon admits he resents her. Bonnie tells him she is sorry but for the moment he is stuck with her, Bonnie walks away.

Lily is on her way home when Stefan calls and tells her they blew up the house. Lily says what. Stefan tells her they are gone and she has until tonight to leave or they come after her next. Lily tells him they are centuries old and she has some motherly advise for him….run. Lily hangs up the phone. Stefan looks worried.

At Matt’s badge ceremony the three girl heretic’s show up. The two hold hands. One is named Nora and the other is Mary. Valerie shows up and says its time to get revenge. They start chanting. The sprinklers come on. The girls giggle and then someone catches fire. Matt rushes to help. Next the heretic’s start a feeding frenzy. They also make Caroline’s head feel like it’s going to explode. Lily appears and tells them to stop that the bloodshed ends now. They follow her and leave.

Stefan heads home. Caroline ask him what just happened. She thought they blew them up. Caroline says everyone that was with Matt is dead. The new Sheriff is dead not to mention all those innocent people. Stefan has a splinter in his neck. Caroline helps to get it out. Caroline says she doesn’t see how they can do expat with the heretic’s and that Lily can’t control all five of them. Stefan says he thinks he knows how to get through to Lily. Caroline ask how. Stefan says its,a good thing Damon isn’t there.

Caroline is bringing Elena up to speed. Matt made up a story about a mining fire that made the carbon monoxide levels dangerous so everyone had to pack up and leave Mystic Falls. Lily and Stefan worked out a deal. Lily would give him time to get everyone out of tow. But anyone who trespassed was fair game. Stefan even gave them his house. Stefan says as much as they hate each other he will live side by side with them.

Caroline finds Enzo on her moms bench. She ask what he is doing and says he is putting it up for safe keeping. Caroline says she was about to do the same thing. Caroline ask what the catch is. Enzo says there is no catch he is just trying to cheer her up. Enzo says she may not have noticed but things are getting a little glum around there. Caroline says its Enzo’s fault. Enzo tells her not to plunk him in with Lily’s circus freaks. Caroline says the new here should I plunk you. Caroline tells him to pick a side either them or her. Enzo says she sounds just like Lily. Caroline says that’s because Lily doesn’t trust him. Caroline says she doesn’t either.

Stefan is packing up the bar. He opens a beer and Damon calls. Damon ask if there’s anything Stefan wants to tell him. Stefan says it can wait till he gets back. Damon opens the door and says well I’m back you want to tell me who in the hell is living in our house. They talk about Lily and what Stefan had to do. Damon isn’t happy about it. Stefan tells him not to screw it up.

Bonnie finds Matt and after a hug she tells them they need to stop the heretic’s. Matt tells her they were back in 1903. Then Kai let them out. Bonnie says its my fault. Matt tells her he didn’t say that and now he has to go patrol. He leaves Bonnie standing there.

Damon is on the top of the clock tower. He heads to Elena’s old dorm room and sits on her bed with a bottle of alcohol. Bonnie shows up. She ask Damon what he is doing there. Damon ask her if she has been to Mystic Falls. He tells her about the heretic in his bedroom. Damon tells her rather matter of factly that he has no where else to go. Bonnie says its a good thing she didn’t get hit by a truck. Damon tells her it was three seconds. Bonnie ask if he knows how long three seconds are. He says yes in the first second Elena was in his arms by the second one he had kissed her and by the third he remembered Bonnie was his best friend and he would go insane without her so to answer the question yes he does know how long three seconds is. Bonnie says she was just checking. Damon reminds her she is stuck with him to. Bonnie tells him the heretic’s are out because of her. Damon says no they are out because his mother is a lunatic and everyone is to scared to stop her. Bonnie says she isn’t.

Malcolm comes upon a homeless man and sucks him dry. Bonnie shows up behind him. Malcolm ask her who she is and she tells him the town witch. Malcolm goes towards her and she causes his head to hurt. Malcolm grabs her and starts taking her magic. Damon puts his hand through his chest and takes his heart. Damn smiles at Bonnie.

Stefan is helping Caroline pack up her house so she can move out of it. Caroline tells Stefan she is never going to stop missing her mom. Stefan tells her she can’t sit back and wait for the good parts but she can forgive herself for being happy during the bad parts. Caroline tells him he makes her happy. Caroline kisses him.

Alaric shows up at the morgue to see Jo. The mortician tells her he should bury her. Alaric says he can’t because he plans on bringing her back to life. The guy looks at him funny and Alaric says he is joking and that he would like to see her. Now please.

Nora and Mary coming flying in with a dead Malcolm. They tell Valerie and Beau not to late Lily see. Too late she already has. She breaks down crying and ask who did it.

Caroline is writing to Elena when Enzo shows up. She calls him a stalker. Enzo tells her that one of Lily’s magical elves lost her heart. Caroline is shocked and says they didn’t do it. Enzo tells her he has picked a side and its …….Lily’s damn it….. He shoots Caroline up with drugs.

Back to Damon just waking up. It’s three years later. Damon says he wasn’t supposed to be woken up until Elena was. Stefan says that’s to bad. Damon says why. Stefan grabs the coffin and turns it just in time for arrows to go shooting threw it. Damon and Stefan haul ass but Damon gets shot in the knee. They take cover behind some boxes. Damon says she has upped her game. Stefan shows him his scar and he says it opened up that morning and he realized she was back. Damon says he better get used to it because she isn’t going to stop until he is dead. Who is she? Stefan grabs Damon and says come on.